I got an email a while ago from a woman who was interested in someone but the other person didn’t reciprocate those feelings. It was clear from her writing that she felt hurt and unwanted. This is understandable and I don’t think anyone would react differently.
Honestly, I’m not sure I can come up with anything that feels worse than rejection. Trust me, I’ve had my fair share when it comes to my single-hood. And we’ve all felt it, right? Not a single one can escape it. I think because the experience of rejection is so emotionally negatively charged, it can cause some to behave or make decisions based on avoiding it. It can be so traumatizing we pay the price of never going for our dreams. Instead we choose the safe route or a life at a stand still. Rejection is so tied up with shame that instead of sharing it and seek support most of us hide it deep deep down.
Rejection can be experienced in all areas of life but when single and dating the sting of rejection is worse I would say. I mean in those situations, we put ourselves out there and then perceive the other person as not only rejecting one part of us but our whole being. This is obviously a painful state to be in and it can feel discouraging to put your self out there again. Personally I believe one of the bravest and most vulnerable thing a person can do is to talk openly about their rejection. It’s so empowering and surprisingly healing to just let it out. It sort of loses it tight grip and all of a sudden you’re bigger than it. Therefore, as a healing exercise and to show that no one is alone in facing rejection, I thought we should share our rejection stories.The future stories being published are my own and others (with their consent of course!).
I’ll start with a light rejection story that happened to me, just to get into the rejection mood. It’s about the time I got rejected by a pizza (that’s right). At one point I had no interest in anyone what so ever. I was swiping away while watching some bad horror movie when a picture of a delicious margarita pizza (my favorite) popped up on the screen. Without even thinking twice I swiped right and guess what? We got a match! It didn’t take long before the pizza messaged and asked what type of topping I prefer and of course I replied I liked what I saw on the picture. The conversation progressed smoothly but took a quick turn when I asked how it feels to be inside an oven. The pizza told me that it was in a freezer and therefore didn’t need an oven only a microwave. I expressed that I must have misunderstood, I though I had swiped right to a fresh oven baked pizza not a microwave one. To my huge disappointment, the next thing I know, the pizza had unmatched me. At that moment I realized my so called love life had hit a new low 🙂
This incident clearly isn’t something that has bruised me for life. I just think it’s important to be able to laugh at life too. The plan now, is to publish a rejection story once a week for the next month.